Friday, November 11

Keep Your Hands OFF My B.......

..uckets!

Hello, my name is BobbyJean and I don't like to be touched.
OK..it's Rachael, but the "being touched" part is still true.

I mean I hug family and loved ones, even my dogs and cows, but my body has a strange, uncontrollable reaction when a stranger touches me...eyyyuck.

Grocery store line bump?
-Holding my breath for-ev-er.

Stranger puts his/her hand on my shoulder?
-Throw up in my mouth.

I can't help it.
I also hold my breath when people walk by me on airplanes.
But that's a horse of a different color....No! Idon'tknowwhy!

Aside from me being personally touched(I made a face the entire time I typed that, FYI), I don't like for my stuff to get tampered with.
Stuff, like work stuff...and ANYthing else I own.

You wanna use it?  No problemo amigo, just ask mamacita.  I dont'mind.

The thing is, I know where things are.  With the exception of my keys...daily.
How bout, I know when things are different...better?
Especially things I USE each.and.every.single.day.

They had better be in the spot, where I left them when I was finished using them.
Or somebody better start running.

This is when Chuck, my loving honey, would say, "You don't wanna be that guy".
But he's right. You don't.

You sure didn't this morning.

This morning I went to feed calves...yes, just like normal.
I have a routine, during which I mix 5-gallon buckets of milk to feed my babies from.
I can get enough milk out of each 5-gallon bucket to feed 10 calves.
Therefore, I have 10 smaller feed buckets to put the milk in for the calves to drink out of.
Not rocket science people.

I took the 5-gallon buckets out to the calves, and went back to stack my smaller buckets to bring out.
...................there were only.EIGHT...........................


(That's not 10.)

I had been in a good mood!
I even did a chubby-gnome dance while mixing milk. (What I look like in my coveralls...sexy.)

When I realized there were only 8 I got hot.
Like sweating.
Like, I scrub and sanitize these buckets every.single.day. TWICE A DAY.
And someone, some renegade outlaw, just sauntered in here-spurs jangling-and lit out with 2 buckets.
Pfffffttttt! The nerve!!!

Didn't they see the sign?!



Wait...waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait.
Please believe me when I tell you that I DID NOT write that sign.
Yes, it is still on the wall, over the buckets...but I beg you to have more faith in me than that.

I have lost a few friendships over this,
"DO NOT TOUCH THESE BUCKETS!!!
If you need one find the ones you have done stole from this barn"
signage.


But at least I know I'm not alone.
There are others like me who have OCDand even worse grammer.
Others who have worked for us, and all they want at the end of the day is for someone to respect their buckets.

Don't oogle my buckets, is that too much to ask?
I know they're clean and stacked perfectly, but HANDS OFF!
Next time I won't be so nice.

2 comments:

Lay it on me..