Mount Vesuvius

....I put a chicken in the crock pot this morning.
.........
.........
Those may be my famous last words.

I am really trying not to think about it right now, but as you can see...I blurted it out first thing.
BUT I put the slow cooker on "low" and didn't put as much water in it.
ItHadBetterGetDoneByLunch!

I have dreamed up a white bean chicken chili recipe and reeeeaaaallllly want to make it.
I browsed the internets and came up with not.one.single.recipe that suited me...so I am just gonna wing it.

There were lots of turkey chili recipes though...which would make for super great dishes to throw that leftover turkey from Thanksgiving in!
...Just a thought.

By the by, I am SO jealous of all of you turkey-makers out there.
I love, love, love making...well anything...but unfortunately Thanksgiving is not my holiday to cook.
Boo.

I do, however, get Christmas!
So that's something...right?!

I have decided that I am going to make Beef Wellington again, like last year.
What could be better than beef tenderloin in pastry?
Nothing. That's right. Nothing.

Thanksgiving and Christmas aside, I need to ask you a question....
I need you to be honest.
I don't care if it's not what I want to hear.
Brutal honesty.
OK?

Did you check on things here while I was gone, like you said you would?
Did you?

Did you happen to notice the free-for-all that was occurring in my calving barn?
Hmm?

The 4 cows and SIX calves that were all just kinda hangin' out together?
I'm referring to the FOUR HOLSTEIN cows and SIX calves...TWO of which were JERSEYS?
No?
Nothing?

Just checking.

Since I had no idea which calf belonged to which cow, I loaded all the mama's up and brought them to the barn yesterday.
Hmph!

That left me with 6 calves to bottle feed.
I am out of empty hutches....inn's full!!!..which means I have 6 in a pen.

Have you ever tried to feed 6 bottle calves in a pen together?
Let me paint you a picture....

Bottle in my left hand...
Bottle in my right...
Bottle between my knees...(short Jersey)...
One calf sucking on my back pocket...
One calf sucking on my right knee...
One calf sucking on the neck of the calf sucking on my knee...

Think you're done?!
Just wait til the three on the bottles are finished.

I was sweating.
They were hungry.
I yelled at Mercy.
Then I went home.

This morning I got to work early...after sealing my fate with Mount Vesuvius( my slow cooker).

I had a plan.
I had the calves in the barn lined up, assembly line style, drinking from bottle holders.

Which would have been G-enius, if they all drank at the same rate...
Instead, dingy on the left finished first, ran over to the one beside him who backed up like he had been goosed, who ran into the one beside him who caused a domino effect.

It's great to be back;).